say this is only a dream and afterwards morning
say i will emerge from this shadowy darkness
obstinately I grab the day in my teeth
taking steps back growling
but life pulls it away tearing it to shreds
blindfolded in my dream
i summon up names of streets
places that witnessed my life and youth
port au prince streets i owned as a young girl
and in my sleep
my lost steps join street corners I crisscrossed
in childhood days
men ki kote la ri fè kwen
grande rue
rue des fronts forts
rue bonne foi
rue pavée
ruelle marcelin
where have you all gone streets I loved?
i miss you down to the sole of my shoes
how many places this temblor stole from me
the champs de mars had dovecotes once
and now they’re gone
and the palace? my palace collapsed
tell me what careless hands dropped this old confection
it lays now
ruined
crumbled like a white layered cake
rue des miracles
dear to my heart
miracles happen in this country
don’t let anyone tell you otherwise,
the first major recorded one was in 1804
and a january too
and a few days ago
15 days after the earth trembled
a 15 year old girl’s live breath trembled too
a small miracle
one out of two hundred thousand
miracles happen
haitians would have died of willful neglect
hunger and grievous pain but here they are
rue des miracles street of miracles
i’ll say a hail mary and hail all the saints to you
rue bonne foi
street of good faith where we have been tried and found righteous
rue des fronts-forts
se lè gen dife ou konn konbyen kokobe ki gen nan ri dè fwonfò
this entire city of wounded
how will they all fit in rue des fronts forts?
ruelle chrétien
konbyen kretyen vivan ki rete pou entere tout mò sa yo?
and the living remain only to bury the dead
in my sleep i roam in a city i have lost
and two hundred thousand ghosts
i have yet to grieve for
ki mouri san libera
sans je-ne sais-quoi
kou avadra
died without a flower
a song or a prayer
but a white cross placed by daniel rouzier
black ribbons floating in the wind
so we do not forget
two hundred thousand ghosts follow my footsteps
the earth opened magaly said
and swallowed the house and the people
as if it were hungry
i did not
i did not master the art of losing elizabeth bishop
the world is empty of what I prized and what was mine
and like a dog i try obstinately to keep yesterday in my teeth
taking steps back and growling
as life pulls it away tearing it to shreds
michèle voltaire marcelin
(painting: sénèque obin)
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